Debunking Dance Moms

At one point or another, we have all fallen victim to the allure of reality TV. Some enjoy the Kardashians, or the Bachelor, but for me, my guilty pleasure was Dance Moms. Now, while I will admit to watching the first four seasons, I have not watched since fan-favorite, Chloe Lukasiak, made her departure. And though I have not watched since, I still have many opinions about the show, and would like to share them here.

First and foremost, Abby Lee Miller is not the rule. In fact, she is the glaring, hulking, embarrassingly-noticeable exception to the rule. What Abby Lee Miller showcases on Dance Moms is unarguably child abuse. Since the first season, when she yelled at Christi Lukasiak, mother of one of Abby’s dancers, for her child’s headband falling off on stage, or when she threw a chair at student, Paige Hyland during season three, Miller has shown that she doesn’t cares what the camera picks up. While teachers are allowed to be harsh and provide constructive criticism to dancers, it is not professional to mock children, or criticize them for what they look like.

Some people choose to see Abby Lee Miller as a standard competitive dance teacher, and I can understand why this can avert parents from enrolling children into a dance studio. But, it is also important to remember that Miller is not the teacher that these girls see daily. While she is emphasized to be the main teacher, Miller has a staff of 7 other teachers who teach a majority of the classes held at her studio. Miller is just the overseer of it all, and handles more of the business side, that is until Dance Moms came into her life.

Secondly, the emphasis is never put on winning. If you’ve watched Dance Moms before, you’ve probably heard the expression, most often quoted by Miller and occasionally the rest of the cast, “Second is always the first to lose.” While Miller does put an emphasis on getting first place in every competition they go to, that is not the case for a majority of studios. The point of competitions is to have fun, and while I was never a competitive dancer, I had friends who were and I attended many of their competitions. Whenever I went, the atmosphere was always fun, and light-hearted, all of the teachers would chat with one another, and students would be having a good time getting ready or gossiping with each other about boys and school.

For most studios, the point of the competition is to get out there. Give their students a lesson in stage presence, or even to get their choreography out there. While it is always nice to place, most of the fun is in the performing, and for teachers and even parents, the opportunity to see their children dance and having fun. This emphasis is not noticeable in Dance Moms, and the ALDC is very much focused on the win, and not so much the journey of learning and performing.

Studio Moms aren’t that crazy. In fact, in my experience, most of the Mom’s are supportive of the other children, and never degrade other people’s children in order to get their daughter “ahead”, whatever that means. While there was a sort of camaraderie amongst the Mom’s in the first, second, and arguably the third season, that went downhill after Dance Mom, Kelly Hyland, and her daughters publically left the show. Since then, it has been one fatal backstabbing after another, and now, in their fifth season, it seems as if no one likes each other at all and the only people who get along are the kids themselves.

I would also like to point out, that in my case, I have never seen a parent stay for an entire class for a child that was over the age of 8. In the first season, there was a heavy emphasis placed on how the Mom’s never had time to cook dinner or even tend their other children because they had to bring their child to dance. If a parent is concerned that dance is going to take over their life, I think it is safe to say that this is not the case. If a child is taking dance recreationally, dance will never be a commitment so big that a parent’s schedule would be affected to that degree.

The competitions they go to aren’t even “real”. I may be exaggerating ever-so-slightly, but it is the truth. The competitions shown on Dance Moms are exclusively for the show. While it is real in the sense that there are real scholarships, and the judges are actual professional dancers or former professional dancers, the whole kit and caboodle is orchestrated by the production company. Production, as expected, not only causes the drama, but is responsible for the ridiculous grand entrance the company makes every episode, and even delays the start time of the competition in order to film.

I also didn’t mention that these competitions actually advertise that they are strictly for the show. Sheer Talent blatantly advertises this on their website, it’s even on their front page. It’s probably the only way they would get attendance anyway.

So, if anyone has ever had doubts about dancing due to the insanity that is Dance Moms, don’t worry, it is smoke and mirrors anyway. However, this in no way diminishes the fact that these children are fabulous dancers. On the other hand, the training isn’t supposed bring negativity to a child's life. Most of the current and former dancers, such as Kalani Hilliker and Chloe Lukasiak, train at studios that aren’t the ALDC. These studios, Club Dance and Studio 19, provide a nurturing environment which isn’t filled with the constant drama that the show promises. And these studios clearly wield better results:

All .gifs found on giphy.com.

#dancemoms #dancing #lifetime #abbyleemiller